Survival Guide to Bali: How to Not Look Like a Clueless Tourist
Bali welcomes everyone—sun-seekers, party animals, spiritual wanderers, and lost souls trying to ‘find themselves.’ But let’s be real, some tourists stick out like sore thumbs, making classic rookie mistakes that scream “first-timer.”Want to blend in and not look like a total newbie? Here’s your survival guide to doing Bali right.
1. Ditch the Bintang Singlet (at Least Sometimes)
Yes, it’s a Bali classic. Yes, you’ll see plenty of people wearing them. But if you want to avoid looking like a walk-in tourist stereotype, maybe mix it up a little?
- Alternative: A simple linen shirt, sarong, or something that doesn’t scream ‘I just arrived and I’m already five Bintangs deep.’
2. Master the Art of Scooters or Stick to Taxis
Everyone rents a scooter in Bali, but not everyone should. If you’ve never ridden one before, this is NOT the place to learn. Bali’s roads are chaotic at best, lawless at worst.
- If you’re renting, wear a helmet (seriously, Bali hospitals are full of helmet-less tourists).
- If you can’t drive properly, just stick to Grab or GoJek. Your limbs will thank you.
3. Cash is King (And ATMs are Traps)
Bali still runs on cash in a lot of places, so don’t rely entirely on your credit card.
- Always carry small bills. A lot of vendors ‘don’t have change’—which usually means they just don’t want to break a big note.
- Avoid sketchy ATMs. Some are rigged with card skimmers. Use ones inside banks whenever possible.
4. Respect the Culture (It’s Not Just a Holiday Playground)
Bali is more than just beaches and parties—it’s deeply spiritual. The Balinese take their traditions seriously, so don’t be that tourist who:
- Walks into temples in a bikini (sarongs are a must!).
- Steps on offerings on the street (they’re everywhere, watch your step!).
- Disrespects ceremonies (if the road is blocked for a procession, be patient, don’t honk!).
5. Avoid the ‘Secret’ Spots You Saw on Instagram
You saw an influencer post a photo at a ‘hidden gem,’ and now you’re on a mission to find it? Hate to break it to you:
- If it’s on Instagram, it’s not secret anymore. Expect crowds.
- Some places are overrun by tourists who all think they’re discovering something new.
- Instead, ask locals for real off-the-beaten-path recommendations.
6. ‘Bali Belly’ is Real – Eat Smart
Bali Belly (aka unexpected digestive disaster) can ruin your trip in a hurry. Avoid it by:
- Skipping the tap water (this includes ice from unknown sources!).
- Easing into street food (go to busy spots—high turnover = fresh food).
- Packing charcoal tablets and electrolytes, just in case. Trust us.
7. Learn Basic Bahasa (It Helps!)
You don’t need to be fluent, but a few local phrases go a long way. Try these:
- Terima kasih (Thank you)
- Tolong (Please)
- Berapa harganya? (How much is this?)
- Tidak, makasih (No, thank you—useful when dodging pushy vendors)
8. Know That Bali Time is Not ‘Real’ Time
If someone tells you they’ll be there in 5 minutes, they probably mean 30 minutes. If a driver says “just around the corner,” prepare for a longer wait. Bali runs on its own time zone—chill, embrace it.
9. The Cheapest Deals? Probably a Scam
From taxi drivers to money changers, Bali has its fair share of hustlers. Some classic scams to watch for:
- Overpriced taxis (use Grab, GoJek, or Blue Bird taxis—avoid the rest).
- Money changers with ‘too good to be true’ rates (stick to legit places inside banks or authorized exchangers).
- Fake police fines (some officers stop tourists just to make a little extra cash—always ask for a receipt if they try to fine you!).
10. Bali is Addictive – You Might Never Leave
Many people come for a week and somehow end up staying forever. Whether it’s the island vibes, the cost of living, or the feeling of complete freedom, Bali has a way of pulling people in.
- Warning: You might find yourself looking at long-term rentals ‘just to check prices.’
- You’ll swear you’re leaving next month. Spoiler: You won’t.
Final Advice: Enjoy Bali, But Don’t Be ‘That Tourist’
Bali is pure magic, but only if you respect the island, the locals, and the culture. Follow these tips, blend in like a pro, and you’ll experience Bali in the best way possible. Now go out there and enjoy the ride. 🤘
